96 Thoughts I had as I re-read Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

So it has been a few years since I have read Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. I started my re-read of the Harry Potter series last year but somehow my momentum dwindled but it is all okay. I am back and I am going to get the last three books read before Christmas…of this year. Hopefully.

I remember buying Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. It was the first book of the series that I would be buying on release day. Unfortunately, I didn’t get to go to a midnight opening to buy it. As luck would have it, I had to babysit my cousin Amy that night so instead I went at the crack of dawn the next morning. To put into perspective just how early this was I saw people leaving clubs and doing a walk of shame in Liverpool town centre as I went to WH Smith to pick up my pre-ordered copy. I also got given some free pencils but that is beside the point really.

For the rest of that day and all of the next, I sat in the living room refusing to talk to anyone until I had finished. I sobbed. It was horrible. It broke me. And now here we are, a number of years later and I know I am not prepared to read it again but I also know that I have to.

Therefore, I give you the 96 thoughts I had as I re-read Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. Enjoy!

  • Oh my gosh. A drought. A hot summer. A hosepipe ban. This is art imitating life right now!
  • Someone has apparated in Privet Drive Do we find out who it is? I can’t remember.
  • God, I forgot just how pissy and whiney Harry is at the beginning of this book.
  • I’m 34 years old, five books into the series (that I have read on numerous occasions) and the Dementors are still terrifying.
  • Yay, Mrs Figg. See this is why I like JK. She sets us up to know about Mrs Figg from book one but only now, in book five do we realise her importance. Genius.
  • Oh man. Harry Potter has been expelled. Well this sucks.
  • ‘They guard the wizard prison, Azkaban.’ Said Aunt Petunia – BOOM! Just like that JK shocks us again! Brilliant.
  • Knowing what I know now, was the ‘weird boy’ James or Snape?
  • Who sent Petunia the howler? I forget.
  • I mean, I can understand why Harry is pissy. No one is telling him anything. It must be so isolating…but yeah he is being a whiney b*tch.
  • I’m sorry but I still firmly believe that Moody should have been played by Anthony Hopkins.
  • When you think about it, Harry Potter is like royalty. Getting from one place to another with his guards, everyone watching his moves. Give him ginger hair and he is Harry Windsor…but with a wand.
  • OK, I have said it before and I will say it again. JK give the people what they want. We want a series about the Order of the Phoenix. All the years leading up to Voldemort’s demise. I mean, I know you are giving us a bit of the past with Fantastic Beasts and I love you for that but this would make such an exciting series. If you ever read this then please, please, please let me get what I want (a little Smiths reference there for you). Thank you!
  • Oh the betrayal Harry feels. Totally with you on that Harry Potter. Sometimes it hurts more when friends let you down.
  • Although with all this petulance and snark you come across as a right moody teen.
  • I think I would like to learn how to apparate. It would make travelling to see my fiancé so much easier (not to mention quicker and cheaper!)
  • Ooh I had forgotten about Percy and his need for status. The one Weasley to go astray but strangely by following the book.
  • Yay Sirius! But boo because I know what is going to happen later on.
  • Mundungus Fletcher always reminded me of Del Boy. It would have been too weird if he was played by David Jason though.
  • ‘Whip out your wands’ hehehe oh JK.
  • Oh it is uncomfortable when Molly and Sirius argue. You see where Molly is coming from but I kind of side with Sirius. He is Harry’s godfather and to be fair none of the rest of the story would happen if Harry had just been told everything. So yeah. People need to tell people things and stuff!
  • ‘Personally,’ said Lupin quietly looking away from Sirius at last.’ There is a fan theory that Lupin is like seriously in love with Sirius. This theory is then furthered by the fact that he marries Tonks who can change her features…to look like Sirius, perhaps?
  • Oooh or the story of Sirius’s bad relationship with his mother. That would be interesting.
  • Sirius mentions Harry’s grandparents, James’s mum and dad. What happened to them? Or Lily’s parents for that matter.
  • What about Regulus’s story – we know he had a Horcrux but we need more information.
  • I love Mr Weasley’s enthusiasm for Muggles. Warms my heart.
  • Oh Percy, you fool!
  • Delores Freaking Umbridge. OK, I know that Voldemort was evil and the villain of the piece but I think I hated Delores Umbridge way more. In my head she is the biggest villain. She is evil!
  • Oh man, Fudge is losing his cool.
  • Yay! Harry is a free wizard!
  • Oh lol. Ron’s a prefect!
  • Luna Lovegood. I love her!
  • What is going on with Sturgis Podmore? Do we find out? I can’t remember.
  • Luna displays some characteristics that would be linked with Autism or Aspergers. If JK did this on purpose then woohoo go JK for her inclusion policy. Way ahead of her time. Or it might just be a happy accident.
  • Why hasn’t Harry seen the skeletal horse creatures before? He saw his parents die so in theory Harry should have been able to see them since book one. I wanna call the horse thingies Kestrals but I know that is wrong.
  • Oh I so wish I could go to Hogwarts!
  • I always felt that the Sorting Hat’s song to be a bit unnecessary. Kind of like the poems in the Lord of the Rings series.
  • I got so sad when Seamus doesn’t believe Harry. Why would he lie, Seamus? Why? Why?
  • Oh Oliver Wood. I miss you. Whatever happened to Sean Biggerstaff who played him in the film *checks IMDB*
  • I really think that Hermione could be the Minister of Magic one day.
  • Ministress? What is the feminine form of Minister? *Googles* Oh, it is still minister. I like it.
  • My English degree really came in useful then. £20,000 well spent!
  • God, I hate Umbridge.
  • Eurgh, the ‘Carefully structured, theory centred, Ministry-approved course’ is so something that the government and OFSTED would approve of – in other words, boring.
  • ‘I must not tell lies.’ This woman’s actions are abhorrent!
  • Poor Filch. I mean, I know that he is a pain in the ass but he is the epitome of the lonely old man who lives on your street that yells if you haven’t put your bins out on the correct day. I can’t help but feel a little bit sorry for him.
  • Ohhh, it is coming back to me now. Isn’t Sturgis under the Imperious Curse?
  • Next they will have an OFSTED inspection. Oh god, Percy you are so pompous we may as well call you Michael Gove.
  • NIFFLERS! I want a Niffler!
  • Hermione said Voldemort on the same night she said ‘There are things more important than homework.’ My world has been rocked.
  • Who is the hidden witch at the Hog’s Head? I can’t remember.
  • Holy crap. I have just realised it is JK’s birthday which means that it is also Harry Potter’s birthday. Happy Birthday to them both.
  • The enchanted stairs are a brilliant tactic to keep the boys out of the girls dormitory/ If only we had them in my school to make the students go to the correct classroom on time.
  • Thestrals – that’s what they are called. Not Kestrals Lisa, you doughnut.
  • Mundungus was the witch in the Hog’s Head. Of course, lol. I am dumb.
  • My chin scar has never given me random pain but if it ever did I will be very aware that I have an enemy.
  • Oh Winky, still a butterbeer-aholic. Bless but yay to Dobby!
  • My room of requirement would be filled with books…so essentially it would be a library.
  • It is confusing that Hermione isn’t inn Ravenclaw. She is so smart.
  • God, I love Luna and her lion hat!
  • God, Umbridge is evil!!! I can’t believe she gives a lifetime Quidditch ban to Harry, Fred and George. She is a monster.
  • Hagrid is back! Yay!
  • God, Cho Change is a drama queen. She is so bloody high maintenance.
  • Harry and Cho made with the smooches under the watchful eyes of the nargles hiding in the mistletoe.
  • ‘One person can’t feel all that at once, they’d explode.’ God I love Ron!
  • I wonder if snakes will ever get rid of their bad reputation.
  • Oh poor Neville. You cannot help but feel sorry for him. My heart breaks for him.
  • What do wizarding children do before Hogwarts? Do they go to a normal sstyle of school but in the wizarding community? Like where do they learn English and Maths?
  • Ooh the death eaters have broken out of Azkaban. Meep!
  • Cornelius Fudge has warned the ‘muggle prime minister’. If this book was set in the present day then all muggles would be screwed.
  • Oh Harry, when you are on a date with one girl do not mention another girl. You doughnut!
  • Although I stand by my earlier assessment that Cho is a drama queen.
  • I still maintain that Rita Skeeter should have been played by Bernadette Peters.
  • I tell you what, Harry having the same dream over and over again is like Groundhog Day.
  • Barry Chuckle has died. Off topic, I know but man, sad day for children’s entertainment.
  • Oh Firenze, shunned for doing the right thing.
  • I love Fred and George. I love their sense of playfulness and whimsy. For what is life without whimsy?
  • I really believe that it is book five when Harry Potter grew up. He was confronted with the thing we all must go through at some point – when we realise that our parents aren’t, in fact, infallible but that they are human after all.
  • I love it when McGonagall takes none of Umbridge’s crap. Go Minerva! Nope that is too disrespectful – she has to be addressed as Professor McGonagall.
  • I was never a fan of Grawp.
  • I can’t believe they stunned McGonagall. Those B*st*rds!
  • Oh I know what is coming up soon and I don’t want it to happen.
  • Umbridge is using physical support on Harry. Erm, that is so not allowed.
  • I cannot believe she was going to use an unforgivable curse on Harry Potter. She is evil.
  • She is so pissed on power.
  • Oh the veil. Sob!
  • I know she is evil, by god, but Bellatrix LeStrange is amazing and perfect casting in Helena Bonham Carter.
  • I mean, she has just used the cruciatus curse on Neville – what a b*tch but absolutely amazing in her unforgivable nature.
  • I remember reading Sirius’s death for the first time and being broken. Even though I knew it was coming now, it has still killed me. Oh sob!
  • I’m gonna need a few minutes to get over this.
  • Still getting over it.
  • Still broken.
  • ‘Lupin turned away from the archway as he spoke. It sounded as though every word was causing him pain.’ Because he was in love with Sirius.
  • Surely Narcissa and Bellatrix know where Grimauld Place is? I know where my relatives live.
  • Finally, Fudge admits that Voldemort is back. It only took 778 pages, dammit.
  • Oh the two way mirror is just cruel at this point.

I am emotionally drained.

That is one meaty-ass book. It is brilliant but you are hit with so much information your brain struggles to take it all in.

The last two books of the series are ones that I don’t know very well so the next two will be a revelation and an epic journey.

See you then,

Lisa x

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